Constant pondering So stop spinning thoughts

Constant pondering - thoughts that paralyze life

Those who ponder, think after, without coming to a solution, more precisely: The pondering own circles of thoughts in the void is the reason for coming to any solution. Real and simple solutions, the thinker pushes aside or declares impossible. Brooding reflection winds up in negative spirals.

contents

• Constant pondering - thoughts that paralyze life
• Diffuse darkness
• Romance and world pain
• When does brooding become pathological?
• A high price
• The thought carousel
• Pondering paralyzes
• Social isolation
• Ways out of the thought trap
• Pondering habituation
• The brain is changing through activity
• Nature and movement
• attentiveness
• Social relationships
• therapy

Diffuse darkness

Brooding can paint both the past and the future in dark colors. Unresolved conflicts, unanswered decisions, and presumed guesses are as typical of brooding as are vague "questions" whose "answers" are lost in gloomy scenarios.

Brooderers keep thinking about questions that have no real answer. (Image: alphaspirit / fotolia.com)

Who is trapped in the brooding, comes to "conclusions" like: "It does not matter what I do", "and if that brings nothing more," "what I want to achieve, I can never reach", " look around, the train is racing towards the abyss ", or" if I search for my life, I would first look in the trash can ".

In the center of brooding are usually questions for which there can be no real answers - especially about the meaning of life. As a rule, Grübler answers this "question" by saying that "everything is meaningless.

Romance and world pain

Ruminating comes from "digging" and was positively occupied in Germany. The artists of the romantic world glorified this "ditch" in the thought, in the unconscious, and opposed it to the "superficiality" of modern life. In the nineteenth century this pondering was so typically German that the term Weltschmerz, like kindergarten, came into English because there was no adequate word in English for him.

Meanwhile, the German "Weltschmerz" outlines the problem of constant pondering. He refers to a general suffering in the world, but without the revolutionary impetus to change this unsatisfactory world. Instead, the feeling of not being able to change the "bad world" is typical of Weltschmerz.

Ideas like "people are cruel," "why do we even live when we have to die," or "people are digging their own grave" take the place of the struggle against oppressive conditions. Goethe's "The Sorrows of Young Werther" became a bestseller and triggered a wave of suicide.

This attitude has historical reasons: In France, the revolution overthrew the monarchy and pushed the Catholic clergy off the pedestal. In Germany, too, many people were enthusiastic about the French Revolution, but they were just a few.

By contrast, the bourgeois revolution in Germany suffocated the feudal rulers in 1848. The German bourgeoisie turned to "inwardness" and defined itself through education, because it kept the switch of power closed. The "German mind" contained a dash of melancholy, for living under the Prussian knot was not what the liberal bourgeoisie desired.

Chronic brooding became a guideline among German intellectuals since the end of the 18th century. The dreams of romanticism, a longing for salvation, but which seemed impossible in this world, drenched with sadness and cultural pessimism.

"Thought depth" combined with passivity was considered a virtue. In this history of bourgeois mentality, we readily recognize elements of dysfunctional pondering that clinical psychology considers to be a symptom of mental disorder.

Ruminating to a healthy degree is even necessary to resolve conflicts or plan action steps. (Image: lassedesignen / fotolia.com)

When does brooding become pathological?

Thoughts and worries are not considered pathological per se by psychologists. First of all, it is an attempt to solve a problem. Thinking about looking at a problem in all aspects is even necessary to solve complex problems. Those who care about the future can act on this basis and prevent dangers. Rethinking conflicts can lead to avoiding the mistakes that have led to unpleasant events in the past.

Constant pondering, however, differs from this meaningful reflection and prejudice on the crucial point: it leads just not to results and not to actions that could solve the problem. On the contrary: brooding dampens the intensity of negative feelings in the short term. Instead of, for example, living the feeling of inferiority, fear or insecurity, the brooder pushes it on a general level.

The problem of not getting through to other people, being afraid of one's future career, or feeling ugly, stupid, or fat, becomes, for the brooder, "the people who can not communicate," the society that is in catastrophe leads or the "worthlessness of man toward the universe".

A high price

Here, pondering works as an emotional buffer: It absorbs strong negative emotions. However, these subliminally continue to proliferate. If we consider mental disorders to be only partially successful attempts by the brain to find solutions to problems, then the sense of pondering is also explained.

Ruminating is to protect against the breakthrough of strong and at the same time unpleasant emotions, just as a traumatized person splits off the stressful experiences. So instead of experiencing emotional pain to its full extent, thereby becoming aware of the specific cause and starting over after this emotional downturn, the distressing feelings in the brooder are weaker - but instead they become chronic.

Typical for constant pondering is a diffuse bad feeling, passivity and listlessness. The conscious experience of feelings of inferiority and fear of the future is often the engine to solve these stressful feelings through concrete action. For example, sufferers create a to do list, confronting exactly the situations that unsettle them. While a conscious psychological crisis can provoke a decision, pondering leads to a twilight state of non-decision.

Ruminating causes lack of resolve, postponing, self-interdiction and aversion to any kind of change. What's more, if pondering becomes chronic, then those affected feel it as part of their identity. First, they increasingly isolate themselves in social relationships. Whoever only circles in negative thoughts without doing anything to change one situation, is annoying others, to put it bluntly.

People, who always see everything negatively, but at the same time do not change anything, are often perceived by others as unpleasant. (Image: pathdoc / fotolia.com)

Others, who want to help him, feel snubbed because he obviously does not want to change the unsatisfactory condition at all. Moreover, such a person does not give others positive input: no matter what ideas they have, he will dissolve all plans in a gray monotony.

At the same time, brooding people who deal with problems convey a bad feeling, no matter what the outcome of a project looks like. If another's action fails, the musing man shrugs, "because he knew it was useless." If the others are successful, he continues to ponder with the equally unspoken and rhetorical question: "Does that help you?"

Also, when the brooding members suffer from the uncomfortable mood of their uneventful life, they feel un-conscious or semi-conscious as winners. Not to act means that you do not make mistakes. It remains unclear whether an actual solution would have led to success, and from this ambiguity pulls the brooding supposed strength.

The brooding protects him from failure. In his imagination, he can see himself as a misunderstood genius that has not understood the world. But tackling problems would probably lead to the painful realization of not being as talented as in a dream. The price is high: The brooder closes his life and becomes an "undead", who can not live, but also can not die.

The thought carousel

In some situations, almost everyone has their musings, especially when there are no concrete answers to questions that put a strain on us or if we can not influence developments at the moment.

An example: Someone works in a job for which he is real or supposedly overqualified. The boss makes a comment to an employee, indicating that he has provided for the person concerned a more demanding job. The affected person now shatters his head about whether the boss was serious, what kind of job this could be, whether he would expect a more demanding job, etc.

He ponders whether he should perhaps address the boss directly or rather keep the ball flat; He ponders whether the employee did not misunderstand, or even lied. At night, the person concerned can not fall asleep, because the thoughts turn in circles, and he can not get out of this thought carousel. Because he can always give only his "own answers", but always run back to the non-knowledge of the result.

Many people are familiar with the problem of not being able to fall asleep at night because of all the pondering. (Image: dusanpetkovic1 / fotolia.com)

Increasingly, negative ideas sneak into the mindset: Did I offend the boss? Does he really want to quit? The insomnia makes the thought loops seem more and more agonizing. It is difficult for the person concerned to distract himself. He goes for a walk, meets up with friends, watches one DVD at a time, but his thoughts circle around the one point.

Our "brooding" about catastrophes evolved evolutionarily. Learning from the past to avoid danger is as meaningful as it is vital. But if a person, for whatever reason, feels chronically insecure or has deep-seated fears, this catastrophic thinking becomes self-reliant and paralyzed.

A quarrel with the partner now triggers pondering about whether the relationship is secure and keeps circling around this point. The less important the partner was the dispute, the more annoying this pondering him, and the more the unsettled person ponders.

Or the boss asks when the work is done. Now the brooding begins: Is he dissatisfied with my work? Was the question really a warning? What can I do better? Did not I work hard enough? The longer the pondering lasts, the more the uncertainty grows.

Pondering paralyzes

"Healthy" people annoy brooding, their own as well as the other's. No wonder: We think to get results. An unsatisfactory result is still better than none. Anyone who is psychologically stable generally finds pondering annoying. For example, he or she wants to raise their legs after work, go to the Christmas market, or watch the latest Walt Disney movie with their children. Instead, a thought like a worm bores into the brain and prevents the enjoyment of life.

In social relationships, pondering others is just as annoying. If a teenager moves into the world without knowing what to expect, he is likely to have a conflict when his parents warn him about concrete dangers. Such conflicts often escalate, but do not paralyze those affected when they are clear. For example, the mother says, "I do not want you to go to the disco with Lukas. Lukas drunk and has already caused two accidents, "then maybe the youngster rebels, but knows what it's all about.

But if this teenager has to endure a pondering mother every Sunday at breakfast, saying, "I'm worried about your future," but without naming what that worries are and offering no alternatives, it not only paralyzes her own choices, but also the decisions of her child. Typical of this pondering of parents who can not let go is also a diffuse "something we have done wrong" instead of saying "I think we made mistakes in education ...".

Parents who have trouble leaving their children often burden them with constant pondering and indefinite worries. (Wavebreakmediamicro / fotolia.com)

Here comes the same dysfunctional protection of pondering: Parents dampen the painful experience that children grow up and become detached. Instead of adjusting to the situation, they ponder a supposedly bleak future of the child, or a supposed past, rather than the child, who is going his own way to plan concrete steps for the future. The result is stagnation in everyone involved and a twilight state that stifles meaningful life projects before they even begin.

Social isolation

Constant pondering leads to social isolation. Outsiders, friends and acquaintances soon do not know how to start with such a person. It is typical for Grübler to respond to specific questions with "maybe", or even "maybe someday" to restrict a possible agreement with "not here and not now", or "if ... then" to design constructions, if one "Yes" or "no" would be asked.

"It can be", "I do not know" or "question everything" instead of responding to point-blank criticism, give the speculator a dubious self-protection in social relationships. He or she does not say yes, because he does not say no and therefore can avoid a general in every possible argument.

But this does not last long in friendship, love relationship and no job.

Ways out of the thought trap

Brooding people are trapped in the trap of their own thoughts. But thoughts can be trained. The first lesson for Grübler is: Make yourself aware again and again that thoughts are only thoughts. Thoughts are not deeds, otherwise it would be full of murderers. When we are in a difficult life situation, it is even good to think about what we can do instead of fleeing in blind action. Complex solutions take time.

However, healthy thinking is appropriate for a situation. The opposite of negative thinking is not "positive thinking". Rather, the ideology sold as "positive thinking" denotes psychological manipulation or brainwashing and is nothing more than a denial of reality. Anyone who thinks that there are no more problems, if he thinks only "right", behaves no differently than the brooder, who considers his negative thoughts to be reality.

What is called for is realistic thinking. This means not to change your thoughts, but to perceive them. Consciousness creates distance. From a distance, thoughts can be compared to reality. Meditation helps here: We let the thoughts pass by and only watch them without evaluating them.

Pondering habituation

The problem with pondering is that the brain remembers. How we respond to a situation changes the neural patterns to deal with information. In short, those who get used to compensating for difficult situations by inconclusive pondering inoculate brain thinking. Without alternative strategies, the neural pathways will always start frustrating pondering again when decisions are made.

This can affect every aspect of life and can ruin all life goals: Instead of addressing a man I crave, I once got used to lying in bed and imagining him laughing at me. Once pondering is set in motion, the same loops will now run in every relationship that could take place. If I now meet a person who attracts me, then a pattern sets in which makes a relationship impossible. I do not speak to this person, but fantasize about him. This person can not know that, because the only way to communicate my feelings to him is to address him.

Once we get used to pondering, it becomes more and more difficult for us to master situations. Even objectively simple "hurdles" we perceive as stress and anxiety. Ruminating promises us to avoid this stress and anxiety. We will be unhappy.

Who gets used to pondering, often feels stressed even at small "obstacles" and overwhelmed. (Image: StockPhotoPro / fotolia.com)

The brain is changing through activity

In doing so, the brain changes by activity. So, if pondering seems to dampen negative emotions, it's only for the price that the bad basic feeling stays. The amygdala, our alarm and threat center, stays in readiness all the time. So the brooder goes through the world with a filter that gives him negative information.

Constant pondering as a symptom of depression or anxiety disorder can not be resolved without long-term therapy.

But if we ponder too much without suffering from a serious mental disorder, then we can positively activate our brains: Even the experience of success saves the brain, and a healthy optimism can also be trained.

Nature and movement

Very important is exercise. When we feel the body, the brain perceives positive signals. We then feel alive, and this feeling is lost first of all by pondering and, secondly, counteracts brooding. Many scientists know how exercise prevents thought-loops. When they brood hours and days over a problem without coming to a conclusion, these researchers go to the gym or hike in the woods.

The good thing about this "anti-Grübel movement" is that it works without "thought work". Brooder, whom the pondering is unpleasant, often try to fight the thought-circles by thought. But once they are caught in their loops, then their mental "solutions" get into the same loop.

But when we swim, run, or climb, we use our brain differently. It now needs its synapses to coordinate the body. The pondering disappears, first at short notice, and with regular training in the long run.

An outstanding force against pondering is nature. In nature, we are constantly exposed to sensory stimuli that our brain processes: the scent of a flower as well as the humming of bees, the song of a blackbird or a squirrel on the way. The brain absorbs this life and processes information that is good, completely independent of our own thoughts.

In nature, the thought carousel can be stopped wonderfully - because here an infinite number of sensory stimuli pounce on us. (Image: Jrg / fotolia.com)

attentiveness

Pathological brooding usually forgot to consciously perceive the moment. The sensual environment disappears in a cloud of gray thoughts.
Who respects every situation, there is no time to ponder. Mindfulness can include anything: you can focus on the flickering of the tealight on the table, look the baker in the eye, you can pinpoint the smell and taste of your lunch. You can listen to music or watch the movements of your fingers.

Mindfulness includes your own thoughts. Simple questions help. If something goes through our heads, we ask ourselves: is that true? Is it true that my boss does not like me, or is there any other reason for his behavior. Can it be that I have a bad mood for quite different reasons?

If we perceive a situation as negative or it is really negative, we can ask ourselves: what can we do with it? Has the boss put us on part-time and we can not change that at the moment? Then, instead of pondering, we can use just that time to do the cumbersome work, because we wanted to do it a long time ago. Wait for the answer of the university, if you get a study place, and you have, for whatever, set aside 1000 euros? Then you can spend the weeks of waiting instead of pondering with a Europatrip. Even if you get a cancellation, you make such an experience for life.

Analysis helps: Assuming a situation is really difficult and they can not come up with a solution. Then musing also helps nothing. Even a negative result is a result. What can not be changed should not cause us any stress.

Social relationships

Ruminating means social isolation. The thought loops only take place in one's own head and can be broken through the exchange with other people - just because communication per se means the unexpected. Anyone who muses, for whom the inconclusive result of his thoughts.

Every other person automatically brings other thoughts and thus solves the knot, because no one thinks like us. Relationships also help change one's behavior. When we come into contact with others, we solve our own network of thoughts solely through the connection.

Sharing with others helps stop the circling of thoughts and change one's behavior. (Image: Photographee.eu/fotolia.com)

therapy

Constant pondering is considered in psychology as a symptom of various mental disorders. Negative thought loops accompany clinical depression and are often the first warning sign of a depressive impulse. Even people who suffer from a post-traumatic stress disorder, always come back into incriminating thought loops that lead them back to the trauma.

The problem-solving training has proven to be successful in pondering - regardless of the underlying disease. Relaxation procedures relieve the brain and activate nerve tracts outside of the circle of thought.

Mindfulness-based cognitive therapy begins with the perception. Here sufferers learn to perceive their thoughts as thoughts that can be changed.

Acceptance therapies go beyond that and make the patients accept themselves with all the weaknesses and not run away from it by pondering themselves.

In practice, then helps a cognitive restructuring. In this case, those affected convert changed thoughts and build meaningful patterns in the brain to deal with crises. Psychodrama, Gestalt therapy, therapeutic painting or writing help to focus, depict and thus resolve the thought loops from the patient. In the next step, those affected can then change the "brain cinema" in image and text and rewrite the script of their lives. (Dr. Utz Anhalt)
Specialist supervision: Barbara Schindewolf-Lensch (doctor)