How teens and parents get along

Young people and parents get along with each other

03/17/2015

Only come home after midnight, bring along unannounced acquaintances, the first relationship: between teenagers and their parents „crashes“ it often. Both sides must help each other out. Compromises help.

A question of trust
It is a matter of trusting if adolescents who have a boyfriend or girlfriend tell their parents about it. According to the head of the Department of Sexuality Education, Contraception and Family Planning at the Federal Center for Health Education (BZgA), Eckhard Schroll, according to a message from the dpa news agency, there is no obligation to talk about friends or girlfriends. For young people, the first relationship always means a break from the parents. Schroll explains that at this stage they are free to decide what information they want to share with their parents. The willingness to do so is greater if the relationship is right. But if the adolescents fear that the mother or father will not accept the relationship, then they will be more restrained.

When teens want to stay away for the weekend
However, if young people want to take a friend home or stay with them, they must ask for permission. „Since the parents have the house right“, so Schroll. During puberty, many start celebrating. Then it's the weekend for the birthday party or go to the disco. Parents often react with sentences like: „Do not come so late“ or „Be at the latest at eleven at home“. If the adolescents want to stay away longer, they should not refer to friends. As the Commissioner for Child Welfare and Children's Rights at the Professional Association of German Psychologists (bdp), Klaus Neumann, thinks, it is not a good strategy to insist that everyone else is allowed to travel much longer. „For most parents, it is not a standard that others allow.“ According to the expert, it would be better to discuss together what limits exist and where compromises are possible. But if the parents do not give in, they would have to weigh up how much stress the parents have on the topic, says Neumann. It is always important for young people what they are allowed to do. This is held in the Youth Protection Act. Contact points are, for example, youth centers or the youth welfare office.

Do not argue with the topic of health
Among children and adolescents are many breakfast muffles to find. Of the 14- to 17-year-olds, according to the KiGGS study by the Robert Koch Institute (RKI), breakfast is 53 percent a day, with the remainder enjoying a meal break. Parents should by no means argue with the topic of health. After all, according to graduate psychologist Christoph Klotter, this is an abstract concept for young people that they can not do anything with. In his opinion, adolescents are more receptive to the benefits of having a regular breakfast, such as being able to concentrate better and being more successful at school.

Waiver of the breakfast
Especially older girls eat much less often than boys. They often skip the first meal of the day because they want to save calories. Boys, however, rather do without snacks and sweets. Like Klotter in the journal „Nutrition in focus“ (Issue 03-04 / 2015), studies show that regular breakfasts are slimmer. However, there are also indications that breakfast is probably overestimated within food science. For example, a study by researchers at the British University in Bath in which they examined the effects of morning meal on resting metabolic rate, cholesterol levels and blood sugar levels found that no difference in values ​​can be seen without breakfast. And also that it is not so important which meal of the day is waived if you want to lose weight. (Ad)