Patchwork Guidebook For a new partner of children, pretend no sympathy

If the adult child has a new partner, the parents do not necessarily like it. Nevertheless, in dealing with each other, some rules should be respected. According to Christine Sowinski of the Kuratorium Deutsche Altershilfe, two things are especially significant: honesty and the avoidance of unwanted advice.
Express your opinion carefully and free of judgment
If the adult son or daughter introduces the new partner to their parents for the first time, it may well be that "the chemistry" is simply not right. This is not a problem, because parents should not feel obliged to like it. But even if the sympathy is not great, some things should be considered in the handling, explains Christine Sowinski of the Board of Trustees German Altershilfe opposite the "dpa". According to this, "two rules apply: a - never lie and b - no unwelcome advice", says the expert.

Parents expert advice. Picture: drubig-photo - fotolia

If the child does not ask for advice, no one should be given accordingly. Because an unwanted piece of advice can be interpreted as a criticism, according to Sowinski. In general, therefore, it makes sense to keep out of the affairs of adult children. However, if they need submission, the parents should of course be there.

If the son or daughter asks what they think about the new friend or friend, take the first rule: Never lie. "You should be honest, but also do not say, the or the I think terrible," says Sowinski. Instead, a reaction like "I can not find the line to him or her, but the main thing is that you're happy" is better. Because this does not hold one's own opinion behind the mountain, but does not exceed a limit and does not hurt the feelings of the child. (No)