Deal well with the jealousy at work

Constructively deal with envy in the job

04/12/2015

Envy among colleagues is unpleasant, but often unavoidable. If you yourself are the one who is envied, this can be seen as a sure indication that you are successful. However, when colleagues keep pulling past one another, who are much shorter in the company, envy is usually an expression of dissatisfaction. The news agency „dpa“ spoke to organizational psychologist Stefan Poppelreuter from Bonn about the subject of envy in the job.

Talk about envy in the job with the boss
A salary increase or a promotion of the colleague can easily lead to envy of those who feel ignored by the boss: „Why have not I been promoted? I've been in the company for much longer?“ To deal with such feelings is not always easy. „It does not matter if the feeling is justified or not, it's here for now“, explains Poppelreuter. However, the psychologist advises against speculating about why a colleague was promoted and not one himself. But it does not hurt to ask constructive questions, such as „Does the colleague perhaps have more expertise in a particular area or more social skills??“.

To what extent the envy is justified can only clarify a conversation with the one who has decided on the promotion or salary increase of the colleague. But before a conversation with the boss, many workers shy away and accept growing dissatisfaction.

„My boss has to remember that“, Poppelreuter quotes affected workers. However, this often does not work, so that the employee should explain his situation in an objective conversation: „I feel left out here and not noticed.“ According to the psychologist, it makes sense to substantiate why one has earned a promotion on one's own. „For example, by referring to successfully completed projects.“

Use envy in the job as motivation
Such a conversation can help to get rid of negative feelings of envy. In the best case, envy can even serve as motivation. If, for example, you have recognized your own knowledge deficits that have led to the fact that you have not been promoted, they can be eliminated by commitment and initiative - according to the motto „Pity gets you paid, envy must be earned“.

If, despite all efforts, the negative feelings persist, the partner or close friends may possibly give helpful hints as they look at the situation from the outside. However, if malaise and very strong dissatisfaction develop, the path to the therapist makes sense. Signs that professional help is needed can be aggression and outbursts of anger. (Ag)