About living with a dementia father

Von der Leyen and Furtwängler talk about the dementia of their fathers

12/07/2013

Federal Labor Minister Ursula von der Leyen and the actress Maria Furtwängler have in an interview with the „Süddeutsche Zeitung magazine“ talked about the dementia of their fathers and give very personal insights into life with fathers who lose their autonomy. The disease of their fathers also changed them, both women report.

Innocence of the father with dementia was exploited
Previously, the relationship with her father was rather „complicated“ been, reports Maria Furtwängler. Due to the illness of her father she got to know him again in his later phase of life. „I did not know that my father had thanked me for something. He had become milder and happier, "the actress tells in an interview with the „Süddeutsche Zeitung magazine“.

But the disease has also led to many difficult moments. Furtwängler reports that her father did not want to realize that he can not drive himself anymore. „It's about the loss of autonomy. And driving was always very important to him, "says the 46-year-old. „My dad wanted to call the police and just take the driver's license again. "

In addition, dementia had led to their father to an innocence that would have exploited others. So he had lent much money and was often the victim of scammers. „My father was a complete victim of these gambling on the phone, "reports Furtwängler. „In addition, at least 20 letters were received every day: Mr. Bernhard Furtwängler, I congratulate you, you have just won a million euros. You only have to pay 20 euros processing fee. "

Similarly, Ursula von der Leyern reports to the „Süddeutsche Zeitung magazine“. „As long as my father was able to work, unfortunately, a lot of money has flowed into obscure channels. "

When the father with dementia forgets his daughter's nickname
Von der Leyen's father, the former Minister President of Lower Saxony, Ernst Albrecht, lives with his daughter on a property. As the Federal Minister reports, her education in dealing with her father helped her little. „Although I am a well-educated doctor, it has torn the ground from under my feet because the movie in me immediately ran away from the confused, aggressive, old man.“ Thus, the Federal Minister of Labor describes the moment when she learned of her father's diagnosis. „Of course, I know that there are levels of care, but how do the levels of care come to us? "

For Von der Leyen's father, the dispute over driving was very difficult. At the TÜV she was advised to hide the car key, otherwise someone else would harm. „At some point I followed this advice. There were terrible arguments over weeks, "reports the Minister, but the saddest moment was when her father forgot her nickname. „I am 54 years old. I was 53 years old for my father, Röschen, Röschen Albrecht. But there are no roses anymore, Roses is gone. He just asks, 'When will Ursula come home?'“, tells of the Leyen.

Both women report that the dementia disease of their fathers also changed them. „It helped me to grow up. Overcoming my father and unsubscribing, moving from childlike admiration for this impressive father to an attitude that simply accepts that he is what he is, "explains the Minister, also for Furtwängler, her father on New Year's Day Having died of pneumonia in 2012, the experience of having a dysentery father has been dramatic. „I've certainly become more patient with myself in many ways, I do not have to do so much anymore, and I do not even have to perfect so much anymore. "

The number of new cases of dementia is expected to double by 2050
Dementia is one of the most dreaded diseases for many people. For the decline of mental faculties in our society is still full of prejudices. The powerlessness to do nothing about the disease and the loss of autonomy are an intolerable idea for many people. Nevertheless, we have to deal with the topic, because already in Germany around 1.4 million people suffer from dementia. According to the German Alzheimer's Association, the number is expected to have doubled by 2050. Every year around 300,000 new cases are diagnosed in Germany - and the number is rising.

According to the German Alzheimer Society, the main cause of the steadily increasing number of people suffering from dementia is demographic change: more and more people are getting older and older. As age is considered the main risk factor for dementia, more and more new cases are diagnosed accordingly.

A remedy for dementia does not exist so far. However, a study by the prestigious Karolinska Institute of Stockholm University in Sweden suggests that a healthy lifestyle could be instrumental in reducing the risk of dementia. Like the researchers in the trade magazine „Neurology“ This is especially true of so-called vascular dementia, the second most common form of dementia after Alzheimer's disease. Vascular dementia is caused by circulatory disorders associated with arteriosclerosis. Reducing the risk factors for pathological vascular changes, which include smoking, obesity, high blood pressure and pre-existing conditions such as diabetes mellitus, may also reduce the risk of developing vascular dementia. (Ag)